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ARE MOSTLY FRIENDS-LOCKED
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i wanna know that my heart is still beating
wearing my heart on my sleeve
02 December 2009 @ 11:49 pm
and so the only highlight of my day is that my wetseal items have been posted out.
i miss you and it's driving me nuts. but i have to be strong. for us.
i miss you and it's driving me nuts. but i have to be strong. for us.
02 December 2009 @ 02:15 pm
and so i cried.
i cried until i was a miserable, curled up ball on my bed.
i cried until i was visibly shaking.
and still you wouldn't let me go.
i cried until i was a miserable, curled up ball on my bed.
i cried until i was visibly shaking.
and still you wouldn't let me go.
29 November 2009 @ 04:34 pm
are horrible. this is the negative effect of A levels. not that I can think of a positive effect.
anyhow, i thus christen this syndrome, the A level trauma. it can be easily diagnosed by it's three main symptoms, namely crying for no reason, the inability to sleep through the night and the constant fear that you'll be late for the paper because of a flood in bukit timah although your school isn't in bukit timah, or oversleeping or simply because you believe a friend who told you that he missed his chemistry mcq paper which seemed highly incredulous but you believed him anyway.
and so, I started showing signs of this aforementioned A level trauma. the worst of it all being waking up at 530am today, on a sunday, a fellowship sunday, meaning no service in church. and scenese from knowing started playing in my head. the trailer can be seen at this link www.youtube.com/watch?v=k3WSoi51mbA . and it was a pretty anticlimatic show in spite of its suspenseful buildup. but anyway, regardless, my head was filled with scenes of a creepy little girl frantically scratching numbers and weird symbols on a cupboard door and my heart was filled with fear. i should really stop watching psychological thrillers. they always get to me half a year later due to severe lagtime.
okay, post over, back to bio. up and out.
anyhow, i thus christen this syndrome, the A level trauma. it can be easily diagnosed by it's three main symptoms, namely crying for no reason, the inability to sleep through the night and the constant fear that you'll be late for the paper because of a flood in bukit timah although your school isn't in bukit timah, or oversleeping or simply because you believe a friend who told you that he missed his chemistry mcq paper which seemed highly incredulous but you believed him anyway.
and so, I started showing signs of this aforementioned A level trauma. the worst of it all being waking up at 530am today, on a sunday, a fellowship sunday, meaning no service in church. and scenese from knowing started playing in my head. the trailer can be seen at this link www.youtube.com/watch?v=k3WSoi51mbA . and it was a pretty anticlimatic show in spite of its suspenseful buildup. but anyway, regardless, my head was filled with scenes of a creepy little girl frantically scratching numbers and weird symbols on a cupboard door and my heart was filled with fear. i should really stop watching psychological thrillers. they always get to me half a year later due to severe lagtime.
okay, post over, back to bio. up and out.
22 November 2009 @ 05:33 pm
is what i can finally say after tomorrow.
morale: -10^99
sianness: 10^99
-/+ infinity.
i don't know where i'll be next year. i think i'm drowning. ugh. screw it.
morale: -10^99
sianness: 10^99
-/+ infinity.
i don't know where i'll be next year. i think i'm drowning. ugh. screw it.
13 November 2009 @ 01:00 pm
30 October 2009 @ 10:30 am
08 October 2009 @ 02:57 pm
Your love is better than life
I have seen you in the sanctuary
and beheld your power and your glory.
Because your love is better than life,
my lips will glorify you.
I will praise you as long as I live,
and in your name I will lift up my hands.
My soul will be satisfied
as with the richest of foods;
with singing lips my mouth will praise you.
Psalm 63:2-5 NIV
i've got a craving for a good steak. medium rare please:D:D
05 October 2009 @ 11:41 pm
But I say, walk by the Spirit, and do not gratify the desires of the flesh.
Galatians 5:16 RSV
03 October 2009 @ 02:12 pm
Be patient until the coming of the Lord.
We also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us.
Romans 5:3-5 NIV
quote of the day from an answer written in the cj gp prelim paper pertaining to the meaning of the word "passenger":
- a person who rides on top of another person.
classic.
ecstatic17 September 2009 @ 11:52 pm
i've really done it this time haven't i?
i'm sorry love, i really didn't mean to screw things up.
but now it seems that i've just gone ahead and f***ed things up for us.
i'm sorry love, i really didn't mean to screw things up.
but now it seems that i've just gone ahead and f***ed things up for us.
Current Mood: 
morose
morose14 September 2009 @ 11:41 pm
Dreamer
from Henri by The Fire Fight
You are the ground beneath my feet and I say You are everything I feel and say.
You are all i ever needed now
'Cause one day you came to me,
With the perfect gift that I have ever received.
[Chorus]
So tell me what do you fashion?
Tell me what you would like to see
In a world that you are dreaming of.
So tell me what's gonna happen,
Tell me how is it gonna be
In a world that you are living for.
You are the colours that I see and I say.
You are all i ever breathe and say.
You are all I wanna be with now.
'Cause one day you came to me
With the perfect gift that I have ever received.
[Chorus]
So tell me what do you fashion?
Tell me what you would like to see
In a world that you are dreaming of.
So tell me what's gonna happen,
Tell me how is it gonna be
In a world that you are living for.
And so we're saved
Yes we are
Our souls be saved, take me on
[Chorus]
So tell me what do you fashion?
Tell me what you would like to see
In a world that you are dreaming of.
So tell me what's gonna happen,
Tell me how is it gonna be
In a world that you are living for.
So we know
We are the universe
You and me.
Godliness with contentment is great gain.
1 Timothy 6:6 KJV
12 September 2009 @ 11:41 am
to love without regret
ahh bobby's damn nice! " there's a difference between ac and cj guys- this is it.". thanks bobby, it really made my night:D
day 2: where for art thou?! quick quick come back quick<3
ahh bobby's damn nice! " there's a difference between ac and cj guys- this is it.". thanks bobby, it really made my night:D
day 2: where for art thou?! quick quick come back quick<3
02 September 2009 @ 06:33 pm
29 August 2009 @ 11:44 pm
25 August 2009 @ 11:04 pm
got food, will study.
We were strangers starting out on our journey
Never dreaming what we'd have to go through
Now here we are and I'm suddenly standing
At the beginning with you
No one told me I was going to find you
Unexpected what you did to my heart
When I lost hope you were there to remind me
This is the start
(chorus)
And Life is a road and I want to keep going
Love is a river I want to keep flowing
Life is a road now and forever
A Wonderful journey
I'll be there when the world stops turning
I'll be there whenthe storm is through
In the end I wanna be standing
At the beginning with you
We were strangers on a crazy adventure
Never dreaming how our dreams would come true
Now here we stand unafraid of the future
At the beginning with you
(chorus)
I knew there was somebody somewhere
Like me alone in the dark
I know that my dream will live on
I've been waiting so long
Nothing's gonna tear us apart
(chorus)
In the end I wanna be standing at the beginning with you
20 August 2009 @ 05:34 pm
i never thought that i would be so affected by the death of someone i don't even know. i wasn't from band, wasn't from her level and i don't think i even bumped into her in sac before.
but somehow her death weighs heavily upon my heart and when i saw the orbits this morning before going to school, i saw a young and pretty girl with a bright future ahead of her. in school, she's most likely to be one of the popular girls who always appear to lead perfect lives.
but she's gone. she jumped. why?
that was the one question that kept running through my head. even as i read all the blogposts about her, she's so loved, so missed, it moved me to tears.
her death was a nasty wake-up call. not just for me, but for many other sacians too, i'm sure. although most of us probably don't even know her, it's evident that most of the sac community on facebook are devastated that she's gone. and it only serves to remind me of how fragile and how precious life is. it made me wonder if i'm making my life worth it, if i'm living it to the fullest.
no one knows why she jumped. she always seemed so bubbly, vivacious and she actively invited people to church. everyone was shocked by the news of her suicide, most couldn't accept it even when they saw her lying in the casket. that's what most said.
i think i'm so affected because she was an sacian. and although we never really displayed it, there's a strong school spirit that exists within each and every one of us. even after we graduate. and i'm so shaken because i would admit that i do harbour such thoughts. and like theresse asked, how much can one possibly take before she breaks, regardless of how strong she is? and i'm afraid, i'm afraid that one fine day, something will push me to the brink, something will break me, something will push me off the edge. will that be the one decision that i'll regret on the way down? or will i feel liberated, free from all my burdens?
and the most frightening part is that i don't have an answer.
so rest in peace, nicole lim hui, may God welcome you back in His arms.
Current Mood: 
listless
listless19 August 2009 @ 10:49 pm
okay, no, not really. i predict that sometime soon, within the next few weeks, either before or during prelims, i will have a major breakdown. or maybe both.
FOURTEEN DAYS. i can do it! yes yes i can. He will never leave me nor forsake me(: i will Stand Up and Be Courageous cos we're More Than Conquerors!
We have passed out of death into life.
Seek first His Kingdom and His Righteousness
It is the Sovereign LORD who helps me.
Who is he that will condemn me?
They will all wear out like a garment;
the moths will eat them up.
Who among you fears the LORD and
obeys the word of his servant?
Let him who walks in the dark, who has no light,
trust in the name of the LORD and rely on his God.
Isaiah 50:9,10 NIV
i'm trying very very hard not to be very very scared. but i'm scared shitless. and i'm panicking big time. the only good thing is that my momentum has been jumpstarted.
14 August 2009 @ 05:16 pm
somewhat. okay, actually, 20.
hell freezes over 2 september.
OMGZXZX TECHNO. the things i agree to just to use the internet while he bathes?!
life's pretty uh, screwed up now, to put it simply. sure, there are silver linings to these dark clouds but those are rare and few. and i'm now going to spend the entire afternoon typing out the class accounts online. brilliant. and and and, GP AND BIO ARE ON THE SAME DAY. absolutely brilliant. i can't wait.
hell freezes over 2 september.
OMGZXZX TECHNO. the things i agree to just to use the internet while he bathes?!
life's pretty uh, screwed up now, to put it simply. sure, there are silver linings to these dark clouds but those are rare and few. and i'm now going to spend the entire afternoon typing out the class accounts online. brilliant. and and and, GP AND BIO ARE ON THE SAME DAY. absolutely brilliant. i can't wait.